Food Review - The Coffee Club: Warwick, QLD Branch

I'm not one to normally complain about restaurant food. In fact, there's no 'normally' about it. In my 31 years I never have! Until now, of course. Since today's encounter with Warwick's Coffee Club (not Warwick Kappa's by the way; the Warwick, QLD branch of the exponentially growing Coffee Club Franchise), I've loathed to eat anything at all.

After our two-and-half hour excursion up the Cunningham Highway, my wife had the idea of some cuisine other than your stock standard trans-fat delights of McDonalds, KFC et al. The Coffee Club was earmarked feast of the other worldly variety. How thing's quickly turned sour.

Once arrived and seated, the waitress took our order. We waited patiently and in no time at all, the meals arrived. Typical Coffee Club, I thought. Nice short, sharp service.

My wife grimaced as if she'd just caught whiff of some body odour from the bloke at the neighbouring table, only she was looking down at her food; Eggs Benedict.

The toast (or some fancy name for such) was as pale as a pint of milk. It was stale bread at best, glorified toast by the maker who was saving electricity at worst. The ham would've made my cat recoil in fright, while the eggs were as raw as a greyhound's dinner. This trio was drowned (yes, drowned) in hollandaise sauce, which was undoubtedly the worst facet of the dish. The stuff almost dripped from the side of the plate there was that much of it. The smell? Well, let's just say the bloke at the neighbouring table's body odour was a better proposition. The sauce appeared to be mixed with out-of-date sour cream and Hulk Hogan's preserved piss of at least twenty years! There may've been a skerrick of mustard in it, but I didn't want to inspect too close.

My wife placed it to one side in displeasure. Her pot of tea wasn't too bad, despite the fact it probably comprised of Black & Gold tea bags, which the fine folk at the Coffee Club no doubt made a hefty profit on, with an 80 per cent mark-up or the like.

Whilst I looked on in dread at the Eggs Benedict, I'd completely forgotten about my own meal; a ham, cheese, and tomato toasted sandwich. The staple lunch for a meat and two veg. man. Let's just say it 'was' a staple lunch in my dietary repertoire.

For a start, the bread was a like doorsteps. Like my wife's, it was also ghost pale. The margarine oozed from the 'toast' which made it soggy (all the hallmarks of 'bread', I'd say). The ham was indeed worse than the Eggs Benedict's. It made the arteries shrink and harden in equal measure. The cheese looked like it'd been recycled and even then, I doubt if it'd melted properly in the first instance. By this point, I didn't even bother looking at the tomato...

So I leaned back on my chair and thought to myself, at least I still have my mug of cappuccino! I took one sip and belched in utter repulsion. The coffee was so burnt I almost saw the bottom of the mug smouldering. I shifted it to one side in disgust. Had I taken another sip, my breathe would've been likened to the smell of a bear's arsehole!

We got up and left the food behind. I felt sorry for the entity to which our leftovers would be presented. Probably an employee's pet dog who will be scarred for life by the experience. That's if the poor thing survives...

Thirty-four dollars and eighty cents. Daylight robbery redefined. The waitress didn't even ask how our meal was, despite the fact we were up and down so quick we almost contracted the bends!

The Coffee Club. I used to enjoy our time together. As they say, all good things must come to an end. If I were the QLD health authorities I'd be breaking a leg to get to Warwick.

This isn't 1 star, "poor" this is 0 stars and "piss poor"!

By Simon K.

Player Ratings - Swansea City vs. Liverpool: - 0-1

 

Liverpool continued their good form with a fortuitous 1-0 victory away to Swansea City. The Liberty Stadium has never been a happy hunting ground for the men from Merseyside, however tonight’s performance was yet another for the record books; a first win away at the Liberty Stadium coupled with Liverpool’s sixth consecutive clean sheet away from home, a club record. Although lucky to escape with the three points, sometimes you create your own luck. Player ratings as follows:

Simon Mignolet - 8: Made two crucial saves in the first half. His save from Bafetimbi Gomis was among his best this season while his effort from Gylfi Sigurdsson wasn’t too far behind, either. A complete performance from the renaissance man. Any hint of replacing him in the summer seemingly dwindles as each match passes.

Emre Can - 7: Defensively, he looked to struggle with the physical aspect at times. He made several marauding runs from the back and defended on the front foot, winning crucial tackles in the dangerous areas of the pitch. Solid.

Martin Skrtel - 8: The big Slovak didn’t put a foot wrong from the opening whistle. Generally coped well with Gomis. A carbon copy performance since the turn of the year, all told.

Mamadou Sakho - 8:  Heckled by the Swansea faithful, the big Frenchman took it in his stride with yet another impressive display. His introduction back into the starting XI was very much welcomed. A mainstay when fit.

Adam Lallana - 6:  An industrious performance from the Englishman. Along with his team mates, suffered in the first half due to Swansea’s incessant pressing off the ball.

Alberto Moreno - 6: Got himself into trouble several times, which led to a booking and eventually led to his substitution. Comfortable in the new formation, however requires improvement in the final third.

Jordan Henderson - 7: In the first half, was overrun in the midfield, however looked far more comfortable further up the pitch. Although there was an element of luck with his goal, he busted a lung to get into the position and reaped the reward for his effort. His impressive run of goals continues.

Joe Allen - 8: Man of the Match. Liverpool’s best player. Even when the chips were down in the first half, he won several important battles; none better than his last ditch tackle on Gomis. Controlled possession in tight areas and kept the ball moving in the second half.

Philippe Coutinho - 6: Like Sterling and Daniel Sturridge, suffered as a result of Swansea’s industry off the ball. He eventually grew into the game, where his quality was on show for all to see. Will no doubt be more influential in other games before the season’s end.

Raheem Sterling- 6: Like his teammates in the attacking third, anonymous for large parts of the match. He came to life when Liverpool managed to get a stronghold on the game, with a series of mazy excursions.

Daniel Sturridge - 6: See Raheem Sterling. Looked lively with the ball at his feet; it just didn’t fall to him often enough, which is a credit to Swansea, who worked tirelessly off the ball throughout the match.

Substitutes:

Steven Gerrard - 7: Changed the game. His aura seemed to breathe life into those around him. Made a series of crucial tackles in the midfield and got Liverpool on the front foot when it mattered.

Glen Johnson – N/R:  Was brought on to keep things tight towards the back end of the game. 

Brendan Rodgers - 7: The masterful substitution of Steven Gerrard proved the difference in the end. Midway through the second half, Rodgers sensed Liverpool were beginning to get on top and played his Wildcard in Gerrard. It paid dividends.

By Simon K.

 

 

Player Ratings - Liverpool vs. Burnley 2-0

After the triumph against Manchester City it was important for Liverpool to continue their winning ways. Burnley proved tenacious in opposition and a very well coached unit. However, during the match Liverpool's quality shone through, ending up 2-0 victors on the night. Yet another invaluable three points for the Redmen, who continue their surge towards the top four. My Liverpool FC player ratings as follows:

Simon Mignolet - 7: Barely called upon, however when required, he did it well. His ability to come for crosses has improved tenfold since Boxing Day when these two sides last met. Won an innocuous header midway through the second half outside the box, however fortune favours the brave. Sometimes.

Dejan Lovren - 7: Another solid performance for the improving Croatian. Not fully recovered from his nightmare start to the season, with several inaccurate passes lucky not to lead to more for Burnley. However, things appear to be moving in the right direction for him.

Martin Skrtel - 8: The bedrock of the Liverpool defence. He didn't put a foot wrong throughout and dealt with the industrious Danny Ings very well. He's proving to be an able leader throughout this team.

Emre Can - 8: Was once again moved to right wing back in the game's latter stages. You could play him anywhere on the pitch and the German would look comfortable. For a player of his age, his ability to read the game is frightening.

Alberto Moreno - 6: Dealt well in a defensive sense. Played within himself in the final third of the pitch. More to come from the young Spaniard; one of many who's benefited from the change in system since the turn of the year.

Raheem Sterling- 7: Made several mazes runs which are becoming a scary formality when he is on the ball. Some may feel he is wasted in the right wing back position, but like Emre Can, Sterling's versatility is one of his endearing qualities.

Jordan Henderson - 8: Man of the Match. Once again, heroic. His goal just about bettered his effort against Manchester City, with a thumping volley which saw the home team take a much deserved lead. His telepathic understanding with Daniel Sturridge saw him turn provider for Liverpool's second. A beautiful pass, which found the front man to put the game to bed. Growing into his role as the team's leader.

Joe Allen - 8: Continuing his form from Sunday, the underappreciated Welshman didn't miss a beat. Without the ball, he astutely chose his moments to press while in possession, he remained unflustered and played the game in front and around him. An out -and-out team player.

Adam Lallana - 8: He once again ran himself into the ground whilst demonstrating his silky touches and turns. Starting to prove a nice foil for Philippe Coutinho. His good form and consistent run in the team couldn't have come at a better time.

Philippe Coutinho - 7: Lovely touches throughout, however it was his impressive work off the ball which a feature of his game. He led the way with Liverpool's unrelenting pressing, which made it hard for Burnley to play through.

Daniel Sturridge - 7: Could've had a hat trick had he been fully match fit. I'm sure people aren't aware just how well he took his goal with a bullet header, which was directed with precision. His touch let him down at times, but if he can score on the off night, the sky's limit when he is on. It's building nicely for Liverpool main man.

Substitutes:

Kolo Toure – N/R: In a carbon copy from Sunday, he shored things up at the back. Seldom called upon throughout his cameo. 

Glen Johnson – N/R: Ditto Kolo Toure. Another brief appearance from the former England International.

Rickie Lambert – N/R: Simply an introduction for the record books. Didn't get a touch.

Brendan Rodgers – 7: An easier night for the Liverpool Manager, who once again got his troops up for the game. The relentless pressing has seen this team transformed into a genuine top four contender.



By Simon K.

Player Ratings - Liverpool vs. Manchester City: 2-1

After the disappointment of bowing out of the Europa League, coupled with an important Premier League fixture than 72 hours away, Liverpool FC came into the game against title contenders, Manchester City with most pundits writing them off. As said throughout these parts sum seven days earlier; the juggernaut continues. It was a heroic victory for the men from Anfield, in a performance that can undoubtedly be described as their best this season. The elation is high to the point where I can't say much more. My Liverpool FC player ratings as follows:

Simon Mignolet - 6: During the critical moments, Mignolet looked rather shaky; a surprise, considering his current resurgence. Should have come for the ball in the lead up to Sergio Aguero's chance shortly after Liverpool took the lead. Thankfully, those critical moments in front of goal proved few, as the Belgium didn't have a lot to do.

Dejan Lovren - 6: After his penalty miss in the Europa League, it was important for the much maligned Croatian to get back to basics. He had an up and down afternoon, but made several important interventions throughout. Commanding in the air and whilst rash in the game's embryonic stages, his second half was steady. It was important for his confidence that he finished on the winning side.

Martin Skrtel - 7: Once again commanding. The back three were undone by a brilliantly worked Manchester City goal, but other than that, proved able. Skrtel's role in the team proves more important as the weeks pass.

Emre Can - 7: Showed great strength throughout and continues to defy his critics from earlier in the season. Was moved to right wing back in the game's late stages. Once again, he took to it like a duck to water.

Alberto Moreno - 7: Another solid display from the marauding Spaniard. Had to deal with a lot of the traffic in the first held and by and large, dealt with it well. A work in progress, but so far the former Sevilla man's season can be defined as a success.

Lazar Markovic - 6: A mixed afternoon for the nonchalant Serb. Conducted his defensive duties well, whilst also involved in some of Liverpool's finer moments in the final third. He still needs work on his end product, but I have no doubt it will fall into place for the young man.

Jordan Henderson - 8: Talismanic. Outplayed his opponent in Yaya Toure. His goal, no doubt his finest in a Liverpool shirt, thus far. His pressing was first class whilst his leadership skills continue to flourish.

Joe Allen - 9: Imperious. A player who's divided opinion amongst the Anfield faithful, he didn't put a foot wrong in a performance which can be defined as his best in a red shirt. The way he turned on the ball was a skill that simply can't be taught. He's risen to another level and long may it continue. Adam

Lallana - 8: Another player who perhaps had his best match in a red shirt. Lallana's work rate was Dirk Kuyt esque as he ran himself into the ground from the opening whistle. Had the ball in the back of the net twice. The first, goal of the season contender had it counted. Some - including myself - thought it should have.

Philippe Coutinho - 9: Man of the Match. Unplayable. Again, he well and truly outplayed his opponent in David Silva, who himself didn't have a bad afternoon by any stretch. Another goal of world class proportions and one that rivals his pile driving strike from last week against Southampton. Had the ball on the string from the opening whistle. When he's on like he was today, he is simply unstoppable.

Raheem Sterling- 7: Missed a chance late in the first half, but other than that, led from the front in a defensive sense where Liverpool chose their moments to press their opponent. A tireless performance.

Substitutes:

Daniel Sturridge - N/R: Missed a golden opportunity late on to put the game to bed. After his disappointing night in Turkey, some may say he is struggling at the moment, but while the team is winning, the main focus for Liverpool's main man is to continue getting game time.

Kolo Toure – N/R: Shored things up at the back where he won several late aerial duals. A good option to have coming off the bench in these situations.

Brendan Rodgers – 8: After the rigours of the past 72 hours, he somehow got his squad up for this match in what can perhaps be described as a minor miracle. Adopting the pressing tactics, which have brought him success during his Anfield tenure, this win could be described as his greatest as a Liverpool manager, thus far.

By Simon K.

Player Ratings - Beşiktaş vs. Liverpool 1-0 (5-4) - Europa League Second Leg

It was a tough night at the office for Brenda Rodgers’ men in the second leg of their Europa League tie in Turkey. They suffered their first defeat of the calendar year, as Beşiktaş deserved their 1-0 victory on the night and eventually, 5-4 on penalties.

With an all important fixture at home to Manchester City in less than 48 hours, the loss and performance couldn’t have come at a worse time. A majority of first XI players’ endured the rigours of extra time, while the performance itself was indifferent in comparison with previous weeks. Player ratings as follows:

Simon Mignolet - 6: Nothing he could do for the goal, nor the five spot kicks from which he conceded. Was once again commanding throughout.

Dejan Lovren - 4: His missed penalty sums up his Liverpool career, thus far. Showed a willingness to step up in a vital time, but in fairness shouldn’t have been anywhere among the five penalty takers.

Martin Skrtel - 6: Did well in containing Demba Ba throughout, despite the latter’s effort in extra time. Didn’t do a lot wrong on the night.  

Kolo Toure - 6:  Looked quite comfortable at the back. Struggled to find an outlet when bringing the ball out, however he wasn’t the only one. Some may say he was culpable in not closing down his opponent in the lead up to Beşiktaş’ goal.

Jordan Ibe - 6:  Quiet game for the young Englishmen. Limped off during the second half with a slight knock/injury.

Alberto Moreno - 6: From a Liverpool point of view, he looked the liveliest. Provided able coverage for Lovren several times throughout the first half. Still wondering why he wasn’t the fifth penalty taker.

Emre Can - 6: Look comfortable in the midfield. Tired as the game went with cramp and it showed, as he failed to find a teammate with the final pass on several occasions.

Joe Allen - 6: Liverpool’s best player in the first half. Controlled the midfield, however faded as the game progressed. He will be vital for the weekend’s game against City.

Raheem Sterling- 4: Failed to keep hold of the ball in a performance that was among his worst in a Liverpool shirt. Missed two good opportunities to double Liverpool’s advantage in the tie. A night to forget.

Mario Balotelli - 6: Was almost hacked to death by Beşiktaş’ defenders. Detractors may suggest he was to blame in the lead up to Besiktas’ goal, but looked like Liverpool’s best outlet in an attacking sense.

Daniel Sturridge - 4: See Raheem Sterling. Missed a golden chance to put the tie to bed in the first half. Along with Sterling, the surface didn’t help Sturridge’s case, however by his standards, he had a poor game.

Javier Manquillo - 5: Did a steady job at right wing back, despite conceding a needless corner just after his introduction.

Adam Lallana - 6:  Tried his best to penetrate in the final third but suffered along with his teammates in producing any attacking fluidity.

Rickie Lambert - 6:  Tried his best to provide a spark. His work ethic can never be doubted. Took his penalty well.

Brendan Rodgers - 5: He seemingly left the team’s pressing tactics at Melwood. Liverpool’s European and Premier League tactics couldn’t be more contrasting. This season has been a steep learning curve for the young manager, who will hopefully review some of the tactics he’s employed on the continent this season. The only way is up.

By Simon K.

 

Player Ratings - Southampton vs. Liverpool: 0-2

The juggernaut continues. This time with one of the best wins of the season, away to Southampton. It was a complete and utter grind and a victory not too dissimilar to the corresponding fixture last season. The officials were kind on the whole, however, as they say; these things tend to even themselves out. It’s the first time since the mid 1980s under Joe Fagan, that Liverpool has kept five consecutive clean sheets away from home in the league. Some feat, considering the defensive issues at the beginning of the season. My Liverpool FC player ratings as follows:

Simon Mignolet - 8: A shadow of his former self and for all the right reasons. Made a crucial save moments after Philippe Coutinho’s opener. Depending on which set of fans you ask, he was perhaps lucky to stay on the pitch after appearing to handle the ball outside the area. The treacherous weather conditions may have forced the officials to give the Belgium benefit of the doubt. Looking like a totally new goalkeeper.

Dejan Lovren - 6: An inclusion due to Mamadou Sakho’s injury, Lovren had an up and down afternoon in his role as the pantomime villain amongst the Southampton faithful. Was caught ball watching preceding Mignolet’s alleged hand ball incident and could’ve conceded a penalty moments after for a hand ball of his own. Like Skrtel, made several timely interventions and looked solid enough for the most part. Will draw confidence from being a part of a back three which achieved a clean sheet.

Martin Skrtel - 8: Man of the Match. His name wasn’t called much throughout the broadcast, but to me that typifies a good centre half. He made several crucial interceptions and was a towering aerial presence. Graziano Pelle barely had a sniff all day. It was perhaps Skrtel’s best performance of the season. Commanding.

Emre Can - 7: Back to his assured self with an unyielding display. The precocious German demonstrated his silky skills both in attack and defence. His organisational skills are yet another string to his bow. No doubt a future leader.

Jordan Ibe - 7: Did a lot of defensive work due to Southampton dominating possession throughout. Made several mazy runs, but it was another facet of Ibe’s game that impressed and that was his capabilities behind the ball.

Lazar Markovic - 5: Played out of position and it showed. Nathaniel Clyne had the better of him throughout the first half. Has competition to keep his place in the starting XI with Ibe’s rise, however will be utilised with games coming thick and fast over the next month. Was rightly substituted at half time.

Jordan Henderson - 7: Marshalled his troops well in a key area of the pitch which inevitably went a long way to decide the match. Along with Joe Allen, he provided fantastic protection to the back three.   

Joe Allen - 8: Arguably his best game in Liverpool shirt since the early stages of his career at Anfield. Tracked back brilliantly and although gave away a cast iron penalty in the first half, from there he didn’t miss a beat. His presence is crucial in Lucas’ absence. His partnership in midfield with Jordan Henderson continues to blossom.

Adam Lallana - 6:  Again, not really his night. In a game where Liverpool’s chances in the attacking third were scarce, the former Southampton man spent most of his time behind the ball. Crucial that he remains injury free for the run in.  

Philippe Coutinho - 8: A goal of world class proportions and one which he most likely won’t better for the remainder of his Liverpool career. Like Lallana, he suffered somewhat, however was dogged in closing down space off the ball.

Raheem Sterling- 7: His first start after returning from injury and one where he put in a shift. Not much fell for the young Englishmen but when it did, he took it with aplomb. A well taken goal on his return to the starting XI.

Substitutes:

Alberto Moreno - 6: Shored things up on the left hand side in the second half. Was involved in the lead up play to Liverpool’s second in what can be described as a solid display from the little Spaniard. As it stands, the left wing back position should be his own.

Daniel Sturridge - 6: Came on and caused the Southampton defence enough problems to carve out several chances. Unlucky not to score. With the number of games in such a short space of time, squad management kept him from starting the match

Glen Johnson – N/R: A substitution with squad management in mind, Johnson did what was required. Injuries permitting, this will most likely be Johnson’s levels of contribution for remainder of the season.

 
By Simon K.

 

Player Ratings - Liverpool vs. Beşiktaş 1-0 - Europa League First Leg

Another game, another win. This time in the group stages of the Europa League against Turkish side, Beşiktaş. An impressive defensive display from the Turkish domestic league leaders in Beşiktaş, however Liverpool FC did just about enough to deserve their victory in the first leg at Anfield. My player ratings as follows: Simon Mignolet - 7: Not a lot to do, but his one on one save from Demba Ba may just go a long way to winning this tie. The Belgium’s concentration levels and confidence continue to rise. Emre Can - 6: An indifferent night for the German, who at times made some rash decisions both on and off the ball. Looked far more comfortable when he shifted into the midfield.   Martin Skrtel - 6: Made several important blocks and apart from Demba Ba’s one on one chance, dealt with the Beşiktaş frontman quite well. Will no doubt have a busier night during the second leg in Istanbul next week. Mamadou Sakho - 7: Unflappable throughout. He found his bread and butter pass to Coutinho with ease throughout the first half and made some timely interceptions in defence, too. Any initial doubts Brendan Rodger had must surely be dispelled. A mainstay at the back. Jordan Ibe - 8: Man of the Match: From the opening whistle, he beat his opponent with consummate ease. He’s quickly making the wing back position his own with yet another  poignant display. Won the penalty which led to the match winning goal, as his development moves at rapid pace. Alberto Moreno - 6: Did what he needed to do defensively without being troubled. His runs down the left hand channel will continue to improve over time. His rasping 30 yard shot was the highlight of his night. Jordan Henderson - 6: Much will be said about the penalty moment between Mario Balotelli and himself, but a part from that, Henderson kept the midfield ticking and almost scored late in the first half with a good free kick. Continues to be an important component in the midfield, however will need to improve in the final third. Joe Allen - 6: A no-nonsense performance by the little Welshman, who fits into this system in Lucas Leiva’s absence. His performance won’t grab the headlines, but he moved the ball around nicely and along with Henderson, won the battle in midfield. Adam Lallana - 6:  Not really his night, as the Beşiktaş defence copped extremely well in dealing with Liverpool’s front three. Squandered a golden chance to put the Reds in front. He’ll experience better nights in a Liverpool shirt. Philippe Coutinho - 6: See above. The little Brazilian maestro failed to find a consistent pass, as a result of Beşiktaş’ defence and their incessant tactics to remain deep. Will relish the away tie where more space in behind his opponent’s defence will be available. Daniel Sturridge - 6: Carved out a chance within three minutes, however after that, the Beşiktaş defence did a tremendous job in handling Liverpool’s main man. Not really his night, as his quest for full fitness looks just about complete. Substitutes: Dejan Lovren - 6: Very little to do and was untroubled when called upon. In a bid to regain his starting place, game time remains imperative for the Croatian. Mario Balotelli - 7: His introduction changed the game, where he put himself about at will, winning free kicks and ending up with the match winning goal from the penalty spot. Much will be made of the fact he took the ball from Captain Jordan Henderson’s clutches. All told, Balotelli is Liverpool’s best penalty taker after Steven Gerrard. His penalty added further weight to the notion. Super Mario is proving to be an important piece of the puzzle, as the Reds enter a crucial part of the season. Raheem Sterling- N/R: A late introduction to regain some match fitness before the weekend’s trip to Southampton. As always, proved a handful for the opposition with the few touches he had. Brendan Rodgers - 7: Once again, his substitutions proved to be the right ones, as he continues to develop his management skills in the realm of European cup ties.   By Simon K.